Friday, December 13, 2013

Secret Subject Swap - Dec. Take Two! Friday the 13th edition

Welcome to another Secret Subject Swap! 12 fantastic bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts! 

My topic is:  "Today’s Friday the 13th. What does that mean to you? Anything? Do you feel any different about it or is it just the same as any other day?" 
It was submitted by Karen of Baking In A Tornado, the fabulous blogger who created and puts together the Secret Subject Swaps, and someone I am honored to call a friend.

Friday the 13th

7:00 am:  This is the time my alarm goes off so I can get the teens off to school. Make sure everybody is up, wearing clothes that don't smell like hot dragon breath, and give medicine to the kiddos that take it.  Today my alarm does not go off.  I sleep right through the noise of morning rush hour.

8:00am:  I wake with a jolt, sit straight up and look at the clock. I missed them. They're all already at school now. Hopefully smelling acceptable, yet unmedicated. Should be getting a phone call  or two from the school later on about questionable behavior. Awesome. And I didn't say goodbye and wish them a good day.  ~sigh.

8:05am:  I go downstairs to start coffee. I step into the kitchen and right into a puddle of dog pee.  Terrific. I guess I didn't see it there because I was too distracted by the trash strewn all over the floor from the afore-mentioned pee-er.

8:30am:  Floor is cleaned up. Time for coffee! I just love my Keurig! The one that is making questionable noises at the moment..... and leaking out the side..... and not putting caffeinated deliciousness into my cup..... AHHH! Seriously? Do not mess with a woman's coffee!

12:00pm:  I grouchily make my way through the morning chores. I break the mop, load the dishwasher then realize we are out of detergent, and knock over the same trash I spent 20 minutes cleaning earlier. Fabulous.
It's time for lunch, so I begin the daily battle of trying to find a lunch acceptable to the 2 year old. The kid doesn't eat anything but Goldfish and mini muffins.
"Macaroni and cheese?" "NO!"  "Peanut butter and jelly?"  "NO!"  "A pop upside your  How about Goldfish??"

2:00pm:  Phone rings. It's the school. Crap. But it's not actually about behavior. It's about my parent teacher conference. That started 20 minutes ago. Where are you? They ask me. Oh I'm on my way to crazy town, lady. And I don't think I'm coming back.

2:45pm:  Kids get home from school. "Mom don't forget I have to be at the school for 3:30 for practice."  "Well why didn't you just stay after?"  "Cuz I was hungry! What do we have to eat? Nothing? Ugh! We never have anything to eat around here! It's so dumb. Can I have Goldfish?"   Super.

3:40pm:  I drop a kid off at practice, hopefully the right one, and head to the store. I defrosted chicken and need to figure out something to do with it. I decide on Honey Bunches Chicken and grab the ingredients. I get to the check-out counter, and realize I left my wallet in the car.  UGH.

6:00pm:  I've done 3 drop offs and pick ups and have one more to go, but I've got to squeeze in making dinner. I'm glad I took that chicken out of the freezer -------  Dammit!!  Grilled cheese it is.

7:00pm:  Time to struggle through both the 6th grader's and the 8th grader's math homework. I hate math. Why does that have to be the subject they need help in?  Oh good, the 8th grader only has 4 problems to do. Oh wait, each one has a part A, B, C, D, and E.  Fan-freaking-tastic.

8:00pm:  "Mom, my cell phone bill was due today, they just shut it off, can you pay it?"  "Mom, I need $10 for my field trip tomorrow."  "Mom, do you have any money so I can go to the movies?"  Teeeerrific.

8:30pm:  This day is dumb. I decide to pour a glass of wine and surrender. The glass is half way to my lips when Mr. 11 says "Mom, don't you have to pick up Mr. 15 from practice? Like now?"  Grrrrrrrr.

9:30pm:  That's it. I'm done. I'm not doing anything else today but killing this glass of wine and maybe a little reading. But first, I decide to get the biggest, darkest sharpie I have so I can cross off today, Friday the 13th, on my calendar. Cuz this day was a train wreck, but I survived and now I can cross it off!!
I march determinedly to the calendar, pull the cap off the Sharpie, and go to cross off today.




The 12th.


Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts.  Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:                            Baking In A Tornado                      Home on Deranged               Evil Joy Speaks                         Writer B is Me            Discovering Me                      Confessions of a part-time working mom                              Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                         Moms Don’t Say That                          Spinster Snacks            Black Sheep Mom                  Spatulas on Parade                             Just A Little Nutty


  1. So basically EVERY day is Friday the 13th. I can SO relate.

    Love your ending, I needed that laugh.

    1. Unfortunately, yes. And glad I could deliver that laugh :)

  2. Hahaha, I was just gonna say "sounds like any regular day at my house".
    Goldfish rock :-)
    Happy Holidays!

    1. A day in the life of a mom, right?? And yes, Goldfish are the ish :) Happy Holidays to you and yours!

  3. Totally rolled at the ending! Heaven bless you for keeping up with all those kiddos and their practices. I'm not even remotely ready for that part of motherhood! And hot dragon breath - I am so going to use that one from now on!

  4. Lol! I'm so glad you liked it, it was fun to write. And I'd be honored to have you use hot dragon breath :) Kids' sports are awesome, and Exhausting!

  5. Ha, ha ha ha. You got done mate. Worrying about that number will drive you mad every time. See how it made you crazy? I just couldn't stop laughing when I read your post.

    1. Well glad I could lighten your day RPD! Such is a day in the life of me.... :D Wouldn't trade it, though. And it makes my friends laugh!

  6. I think 82 percent of all mom days could classify as Friday the 13th. In potential at least. That last line killed me! Well done.

    1. Thank you Eli! I'd have to say, more of my days are Friday the 13th-ish than not....