Friday, September 13, 2013

Secret Subject Swap, Sept. - Take 2!

It's Swap time! Round 2 of September's Secret Subject Swap! This week, 11 brave bloggers have submitted a secret subject and received one in return to write about in their own style.

I received my subject from Outsmarted Mommy , who is one wonderful lady! If you haven't checked out her blog, I'll tell ya, she's funny and sweet and real and interesting and smart and------ you should just go check her out!  My subject is:

"What is your biggest regret in life and why?"
 
 
My biggest regret?  Hmm.  Could it be:
 
*the time I ate that whole package of raw cookie dough and got food poisoning? I have never been so sick in my life. And I had a couple month old baby who was breastfeeding. Yes, please stretch yourself out across my stomach while I sit still and try not to vomit on your cute little head. I ended up dehydrated and in the ER.
                                                                  
Or maybe:
 
*on my wedding night, when I thoroughly scrubbed my eyes with eye makeup remover pads, only to quickly and intensely realize they were not, in fact, made for eyes. They were just regular face scrubbing soap. I spent 10 minutes in the bathroom rinsing my eyes out with cold water, jumping up and down at the burning, and hoping my new hubby wouldn't come knocking on the door to see what was taking his oh-so intelligent new wife so long.
 
Or:
 
*when building our first house, when the oldest of all the kids was only 8, and I decided to get white linoleum in the kitchen. Yes, I hear you all collectively *face palming* yourselves. Brilliant idea, wasn't it? I really loved how it brightened up the whole room, and I thought to myself: "I'm not going to not get it because I'm afraid of it getting dirty. I will just have to mop everyday and it will be fine! It will help motivate me to keep up".  Um, no. I don't care how much you mop, you cannot keep a white floor clean with 6 kids and a dog. In a tiny house. Where the main entrance/exit is in that room. You just can't. All the daily mopping accomplished was stripping the shine right off the floor, so then it was dirty and dingy. Excellent.
 
Or maybe it was the time I blogged about 3 really embarrassing things I did and people read about it........

****

Make sure to check out each of the other bloggers in this week's swap; they're all excellent:


http://BakingInATornado.com                            Baking In A Tornado
http://hypnoticbard.blogspot.com/                     The Insomniac’s Dream
http://annisbubble.blogspot.com                         Anni’s Bubble
http://www.mypersonalaccent.com                     My Personal Accent
http://www.outsmartedmommy.com                    Outsmarted Mommy 
http://www.homeonderanged.com                        Home on Deranged
http://www.eviljoyspeaks.wordpress.com                        Evil Joy Speaks  http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com                                 Dates 2 Diapers
http://www.rocksnosaltmommy.com/                      Rocks, No Salt Mommy
http://themomisodes.com                                  The Momisodes

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

I'm Squirreltastic!

Apparently, I'm kinda squirreltastic. Or so says Menopausal Mother, who created an awesome Squirrely Blogger Award and presented me with one!

                                                                


Meno Mama loves squirrels because they're "ridiculously cute, nutty, and quirky".  I like to think that she gave me this award because I'm ridiculously cute, but I'm thinking the "nutty" part is probably more accurate. Whatever :)

The way it works is to list 7-10 quirky things about yourself, then pass on the award to 7-10 other squirrely bloggers.  So without further ado:

7 SQUIRRELY FACTS ABOUT BLACK SHEEP MOM:

1.  I have been pregnant 7 times, birthed 7 babies, and now also have 2 step-sons. Yet whenever I hold someone's newborn, my heart and my uterus try to brainwash my logic and whisper "one more...".


 
2. I must drink HOT coffee in the morning. Even in 101 degree July heat, I have to have hot coffee when I first wake up, not iced. It's not the same.


 
3.  I drove a minivan for 14 years. F-o-u-r-t-e-e-n. Recently I got an SUV and I feel 50 times cooler ;)

4.  I am terrified of a certain creature. Terrified to the level that I won't even type the word. Suffice it to say it lives outside, lots of times in gardens, or in the desert under rocks. Not a bug. Rhymes with rake.

5.  My least favorite chore is hand washing dishes. Loading or unloading the dishwasher isn't bad, but washing by hand I hate.



6.  I love to go out dancing, but unless I've imbibed in a few cocktails, my booty does not leave the chair. After a few margaritas though, watch out Michael Jackson!

7.  I firmly believe that a new pair of shoes makes everything better.



SQUIRRELY BLOGGERS I'M NOMINATING  FOR THIS AWARD:

I Like Beer and Babies
Momchalant
Sorry Kid, Your Mom Doesn't Get Along With Others
Crazy As Normal
Indian American Mom
The Plucky Procrastinator
Life on Peanut Layne
Evil Joy Speaks

Friday, August 16, 2013

August Secret Subject Swap - Take Two! A million smackeroos!

It's time for the second August Secret Subject Swap! This week, 13 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts.



My secret subject is:  "You win $1,000,000 but can't keep 1 single penny of it. Who do you give it to and what do you hope for them to do with it?"   It was submitted by That Suburban Momma.  Check out her blog, she's got lots of good stuff to say and you'll enjoy it!

************************************************
 
I love this subject! Love love love.  I have actually thought about this many times. Ok, not the 'I can't keep 1 single penny part', but who I would share with if I was a millionaire.

Part of what sucks about being "low-income" for me, is not being able to give to all the places I want to, and help all the people I would like to help. And for some reason if we happen to have a little extra money, I'm scared of what 'might' happen down the road so maybe I shouldn't give it away. I hate feeling like that.

But let's imagine that tomorrow I win a million dollars! One m.i.l.l.i.o.n. dollars! Sahh-weeet!! Usually the first thing I would do if I got a bit of unexpected money would be to go to Dunkin Donuts and buy a coffee. BUT--- not this time. This time, it would go to:

*The Alzheimer's Association.  A big fat donation to help find a cure for this terrible, awful disease. I have lost 3 grandparents to this disease, and my ex-father-in-law was diagnosed with it before he passed away from a heart attack. I used to help take care of my maternal grandmother before she went into a nursing home, and this damn disease is just mean. It robs people of the thing most precious; themselves. Their memories, their thoughts, their connections to others. And it is something that I am terrified of inheriting.

*The American Cancer Society.  Who doesn't know somebody that has battled cancer? I heard once that everyone, if they live long enough, will get cancer. I don't know if it's true or not, but I wouldn't be surprised if it is. My amazing, awesome uncle passed away from cancer not quite 2 years ago, only in his sixties. And my husband lost his father to cancer, at the age of 52, when my husband was only 28.

At our wedding reception, instead of those little favors at each place setting, the hubs and I decided to take the money we would have spent on chocolates or candles or personalized shot glasses and instead make a donation to the Alzheimer's Association and the American Cancer Society. We made up cards for each seat stating our plan.

 
 
*A pregnancy counseling center. I used to volunteer at one in my area, and it's staffed almost entirely by volunteers. It's a wonderful organization and I would love to give them a boost.
 
*Single moms. Either an organization that works with them, and/or some that I know personally. I was a single mom for about 6 or 7 years, after my divorce from my first husband, and that sh*t is hard! HARD. Not just financially, but every way you can imagine. Easing a single mom's financial burden though is at least one less thing she will have to worry about.
 
*Youth sports.  My kids have been involved in sports since about the age of 4. (If there were any programs for younger kids they would've joined earlier!) I can't say enough about the positive effect sports can have on kids. I know, I know, not always. The world is full of jack asses, and some of them make their way into the arena of athletics; but there are so many good, dedicated, unselfish people that give their time and energy to give kids a positive activity, and it has been a life saver in this household. Almost every athletic program costs money though, and we've been very blessed to be involved with a group that will not turn any child away due to lack of ability to pay. I'd love to be a part of that.
 
 
 
*Lastly, I would give money to family and friends that could use a hand. And people on the street. Did you ever hear about the guy that dressed as Santa at Christmastime and would walk down the street handing out hundred dollar bills from his own money? That sounds awesome to me.
 
Because giving IS better than receiving.
 
But can I at least get a coffee??
 
**************
 
Now hop on over to these other fabuloso bloggers and read what amazingness they have come up with!
 
http://BakingInATornado.com                            Baking In A Tornado
http://dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com                    Dawn’s Disaster
http://indianamericanmom.com                         Indian American Mom
http://www.homeonderanged.com                      Home on Deranged
http://coachdaddyblog.wordpress.com                  Coach Daddy
http://www.justalittlenutty.com/       Just A Little Nutty (Guest Post)           
http://www.itsyummi.com                                   It’s Yummilicious
http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com                       Dates 2 Diapers
http://www.rocksnosaltmommy.com/                     Rocks, No Salt Mommy
http://crazyasnormal.com                                     Crazy As Normal
http://ibddaddyandme.blogspot.com/                    IBD, Daddy and Me!
www.thatsuburbanmomma.com                           That Suburban Momma

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Two year olds don't watch baseball

I spent the last 3 days at a baseball tournament for the 11 year old.  We were in a town about an hour and a half away and the team fundraised to cover the cost of 2 hotel nights for each family. It was me, the 11 year old, the 18, 14, 13, and almost 2 year old. Hubs couldn't go, it was the weekend of his first football game of the season.

So me and 5 kids.  Yeah.

100 degree heat.  Whoopeee.

The 11 year old spent the majority of the weekend either playing baseball, or exploring the hotel with his teammates, always ending up at the pool. The 14 year old thought he might die because he couldn't get the Playstation 3 he brought from home to work in the hotel room. (Yes, he packed the flippin PS3 and controllers and about 6 games. But forgot underwear.) The 18 and 13 year olds (both girls) fought over who was going to sleep where.  They were all always asking what and when we were going to eat. Good thing I planted that money tree in the backyard. ( <---sarcasm~)

But overall the 4 of them were pretty good.  The older 3 enjoyed watching their brother play ball, and were helpful when it came to unloading and loading the car.

The almost 2 year old, well, he's almost 2. And the phrase 'Terrible Twos' is bullshit, because technically he won't be 2 until next month and he is terrible as all get out.

He ran around the hotel room like somebody laced his binky with crack. He literally ran from one forbidden activity to the next.  Slam the cabinet doors, quick run and open the bathroom door, then run to the minifridge and pull out a soda, someone's coming throw it! Now run to the phone and pick it up yelling "Heyow? Heyow?" and push ALL the buttons.  All in 30 seconds. And the absolute best? He could open the door to the room and. get. out. And each time he tried it he got quicker and quicker at it. The last time he got out he ran so fast down the hall that I couldn't grab him and hold the door open so it locked behind me. Thank goodness one of the bigger kids was still in the room and let us back in.

At the fields the only part of the games he was interested in watching was his big brother hit the ball; anything before or after that he couldn't care less about.  He rolled in the dirt, throwing handfuls and thinking it was great when the wind took it away. Rocks were airborne too. He ran up and down (and up and down and up and down) the path between the bleachers and the concession stand. I apologized to about a gazillion people because he either almost ran into them or almost tripped them. And whenever I stopped him from doing one of these toddler escapades, I was rewarded with "NO! NO! NO! TOP IT! TOP IT!" at high volume.

So it wasn't the 19 innings of baseball that exhausted me, or the temperature hitting 101, or even the endless trips from the room to the car to the room to the car. It was a small 30 pound bundle of energy and mischief that had me asking Siri where the nearest liquor store was.

And oh yeah, the boys had to go and play all good and stuff, so we have to drive back there for another game tomorrow.

                                                      

Friday, July 19, 2013

Secret Subject Swap- July Take Two!

It's that wonderful time of the month again!  No, not that time, ew.  It's time for swapping subjects with crazy talented bloggers, and writing a post on our assigned subject.  I look forward to this every month, and if you're a blogger and would like to get in on it, just contact the super cool Karen at Baking In A Tornado.  She's the Swap creator and master.

This month, my prompt came from Just A Little Nutty , but not from Meg herself;  nope, this prompt came from Meg's daughter, who is guest posting on her mama's blog and participating in this month's Swap!  How awesome is that??  She sent in this super cool prompt:

**What if, in the basement of your house, you discovered a secret passageway?**
 
 
So here goes:
 
 
"Laundry is stupid.  I hate doing stupid laundry", I muttered to myself as I hauled yet another load of dirty clothes down the basement stairs to the washing machine.  "No really kids, go ahead and roll around in the dirt in your new shirt, and slide in the grass in those white shorts.  I don't mind, I loooove to scrub the stains out of every outfit you own.  It's what I live for." 
 
A couple of stairs down I stepped on one of the dog's squeaky toys, lost my balance, and dropped the laundry basket.  It thunked end over end down the stair case and landed with a thud against the wall at the bottom.  "See???  Stupid Laundry!!"  I yelled at the run away clothing, as I stomped down the rest of the stairs.  I  started refilling the laundry basket, rather forcefully.  As I walked a few feet away to pick up a sock ball that had made a break for freedom, I noticed that the wall it had rolled up against was a little bit sunken in.  "What in the world?"  I asked myself, wondering if termites could chew through cement. 
 
I kicked gently at the wall, and it started to give way.  The more I kicked, more and more of the wall crumbled.  After several minutes, there was an opening about 5 feet wide, and 5 feet high.  I whipped out my cell phone and turned on my flash light app (gotta love those free iphone apps).  Peering inside, I realized with a start that it was not just a hole in the wall, but a tunnel.
 
I had heard that the Underground Railroad had stops in this area.  I even knew of someone who lived in a house 3 blocks away that had a big plaque out front announcing that it had been a refuge for runaway slaves.  Could this tunnel be a part of that history?  In my house? 
 
Being the brave person that I am, I grabbed a broom and stuck it as far into the tunnel as I could  I ducked down and crept a few steps into the tunnel.  I shone my flashlight around and took in the cobwebs, the dirt floor, and the smell of musty earth.  Looking back over my shoulder at my 21st century basement, I crept forward while moving back in time.
 
I felt a rush of excitement, wonder, and yes some fear, as I moved steadily down the tunnel, 20, 50, 75 feet.  How long was this thing, anyway?
 
My foot kicked something solid.  "What the --?"  I looked down.  Just a rock.  But, wait; something was sticking out from under the rock.  Carefully I shone my light downward, trying to figure out what the yellowish square was.
 
Newspaper.
 
I moved the rock aside and gingerly picked up the scrap of paper.  I blew the dirt off of it, being careful not to ruin this relic that was 175 years old.  By the glow of the flashlight I began to read what I soon realized was an ad:
 
Runaway
From the subscriber, residing in Granville County, N.C.
on the 30th day of August last, a negro man by the
name of Jordan, and his wife Jane.
Jordan is a common size fellow, light black, large full eyes,
has a down look when spoken to, the 4th finger on his
right hand has grown crooked, by means of a cut. 
He carried with him wearing apparel and bed clothes,
among them is a suit of dark yarn jeans homespun cloth.
He wore off a pair of lined and bound right and left shoes,
nearly new.  The woman is a little under common size, and is
in a pregnant state.  She carried with her a purple
circassian dress, a white dress, a dark grounded calico dress,
and some homemade clothes.  I believe the said negroes
were seduced off by some infamous character, and they
will attempt to pass for free negroes.
I will give ten dollars for their delivery or confinement
in jail, in Granville or Wake, or twenty dollars, if out of
said counties, and thirty dollars for the detection and conviction
of any white person who has assisted them in getting off.
 
                                                               Clement Wilkins
                                              Sept. 10, 1838
 
 
 
                                                                         
                                    http://libcdm1.uncg.edu/cdm/singleitem/collection/RAS/id/1765



I stood stunned, unmoving for a moment, not quite believing what I was reading.  An actual newspaper ad, from 1838, which someone had posted in search of his runaway slaves.  Had these two slaves set out from North Carolina, heading north, following the Underground Railroad trying to reach freedom?  And was it possible that they traveled this tunnel, under MY house, leaving behind a clipping with their names in it, to let others know they had been there?  No, it couldn't be.  But here was the ad, in my hand, buried in the wall for almost two centuries.

Jordan and Jane.  Husband and wife.  Fleeing for their lives.  And Jane, pregnant!  My mother heart immediately went out to this woman, carrying a child within her, running for her life and that of her unborn baby.  And Jordan, the responsibility he must have felt; not only trying to free himself, but his young family as well.  Town to town, state to state, running; through all kinds of weather with clothing their only possessions, not knowing when or if they would eat; fear threatening to suffocate them around every corner.

Did they make it?  Make it to freedom?  Or were they caught, possibly jailed, and sent back to unspeakable horrors? 

I had to know.  These people had traveled through my home.  Someone here had helped them.  Had risked their very life to help others to safety.  They were part of my home, of my history, of me. 

I knew I needed to go on, farther down the tunnel, to see what else I could discover. To see what I could learn of Jordan and Jane. 

Carefully clutching the newspaper clipping, I crept forward.  Down and around a slight corner, sliding on the crumbling dirt, and then, there it was....


 **********************************    


I hope you enjoyed my Secret Subject Swap post!  Please go on over and check out all the other participants, you don't want to miss a single one!

 
http://BakingInATornado.com                                 Baking In A Tornado
http://dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com                         Dawn’s Disaster
http://crazyasnormal.com                                       Crazy As Normal
http://raising-reagan.com                                      Raising Reagan
http://aworkingmomswhoas.blogspot.com/              A Working Mom’s “Whoas”
http://indianamericanmom.com                              Indian American Mom
http://www.patiencejuice.com/                              Patience Juice
http://www.homeonderanged.com                          Home on Deranged
http://www.justalittlenutty.com/                            Just a Little Nutty (Guest Post)
http://www.itsyummi.com                                     It’s Yummilicious
 
 

 
 


Friday, June 28, 2013

I'll never get used to it

I've been the mother of bi-racial children for 22 years.  Since I was 16 years old, having met their father when I was 13.  That's a lot of years to get used to racism;  but I'm not.

I think I get more incensed now, after 20 years.  You would think time would mellow it a little, I'd grudgingly become accustomed to it, but oh no.  Part of it is my personality that's changed, I've grown up, I've found my voice.  And as time goes by and each and every one of my 6 bi-racial children grow and change and become amazing people that the world will be blessed to have,  it just becomes more and more personal.

We have not had to go through anything anywhere near as horrid as some other families have, but racism has touched our family, to a smaller degree, but hurtful nonetheless.  We're just regular people living regular lives in smalltown, USA, and contact with racism to any degree is a slap in the face.  These are my children; to me they have no color, just the color of beauty and love and mine.  But to others, it's different.

Last year during a middle school basketball game, a player on the opposite team called my 13 year old son a nigger.  I was not at that game, and I totally wish I was, but kinda wonder if maybe it's better that I wasn't.  When my son told me about it, I contacted the school he had played at and told them about the incident.  Thus began a 3 week process of trying to get some sort of acknowledgement/apology out of them.  When I talked to their athletic director, he acted very surprised (read didn't believe me) that that could've happened at his school.  I mean, they have minority students that go there, and one that plays basketball for heaven's sake. Surely none of his players would say such a thing.  Well, one of 'em did, buddy.  Twice in fact.  Once on the court and once on the way to the locker room. My son's friend bodily blocked my son from knocking the smart ass's teeth out.  And if my son had popped him one?  He wouldn't have gotten in trouble with me.  I don't condone violence as a way of handling things, but, be it right or wrong, in this situation I would not have blamed him.  Heck, I might've punched the little shit in the throat. (see earlier statement about maybe it's better that I wasn't there.)

Last night at basketball we had an incident with a grown man talking racist smack.  *Side note: I don't believe there's anything to the fact that these two occurrences both took place at basketball games.  I think it's just that 90% of the time that we're in public, it's at a youth sporting event :)

The man was standing on the side, watching the game while waiting for the next one to begin.  There are 3 mixed race boys on my son's summer league team and 1 Mexican boy, so this asshole had plenty to talk about.  I didn't hear him myself, but he didn't realize that the white lady standing next to him was one of the boys mother, and also my friend, who was most definitely going to tell me what she heard.  He said his brilliant bigoted bullshit to a kid with him who was no more than 16 or 17, maybe younger.  Way to be a role model, douche.  One comment he said was after one of our boys made a great play, and he said something about giving him fried chicken to reward him.  Really? Really?

I have been very interested in the George Zimmerman trial.  If you don't know the story of Trayvon Martin, you can read about it here.  It could've been my sons.  My sons are tall, and dark, and probably would've walked to the store in the rain for snacks.  All of their sweatshirts have hoods on them,  and their hoods would definitely have been up.  It could've been my sons, who got shot.  Because somebody looked at them and decided that the way they looked met his criteria for bad news. For suspicious. For wrong.  It could've been my sons who are dead.

I would never compare the racial trials I mentioned here (or any of the others my family has gone through) to something as tragic and violent and horrific as what happened to Trayvon Martin.  But here, in my little town, in my little world, in my little family, these incidents are a big deal.  This is where it starts.  These are the small things that taint my children's view of humanity, that make them question so many things (sadly, including their own worth), and that make me afraid. 

And angry.  So very, very angry. 

I have no answers, friends.  I'm just ranting.  And it's so much easier to be mad, then to feel the hurt.


 
It could've been my son
 

                                                                                                     

Thursday, June 13, 2013

June Secret Subject Swap - Take Two! Casting Call!

It's that time again, Secret Subject Swap time!  Karen from Baking In A Tornado organizes this great shindig for bloggers to step outside their comfort zones and have some fun!  This week, 12 brave souls each picked a secret subject for someone else to write about, and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style.  I love the "in their own style" part;  you see your prompt and then get to write about it in any way you choose.  Not like in high school where if you don't answer the question the exact way the teacher meant you lose half the credit.  Stupid.  Nope, this is totally individualized and creative and Fun!  We're all simultaneously divulging our topics, so put your feet up and check out everybody's creativity!

 
 
http://BakingInATornado.com                                Baking In A Tornado
http://singlemumplusone.blogspot.com                   Searching for Sanity
http://www.outsmartedmommy.com                       Outsmarted Mommy
http://indianamericanmom.com                              Indian American Mom
http://dailydoseofdamn.blogspot.com/                    Daily Dose of Damn
http://aworkingmomswhoas.blogspot.com/             A Working Mom's "Whoas"
http://dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com                         Dawn’s Disaster
www.akashicwindow.blogspot.com                         Akashic Aisles: The Basement View
www.thepursuitofnormal.blogspot.com                   The Pursuit of Normal
www.homeonderanged.com                                   Home on Deranged
http:// www.eviljoyspeaks.wordpress.com               Evil Joy Speaks
 
My Secret Subject was submitted by Searching For Sanity.  (She just got a new job, BTW, so go give her some congrats!).  My subject is:
 
***You have just been contacted by a movie director wanting to make a movie about your life. Who will you ask to play you in the movie?***
 
Well.  Should I choose an actress who plays characters similar to me?  Or an actress who in real life is similar to me?  Or someone who looks like me?  Or someone I'm envious of and would squeal like a pig if they even acknowledged me?
 
Tough one.  Ok, this became a group effort.  I was struggling, so I decided to ask some of the kids their opinions (I know, what was I thinking??). 
 
I asked J, my 14 year old son; A, my 13 year old daughter; and T, my 18 year old daughter.
 
Here's some of the responses I got:
 
J:  "Mario Lopez!"    Ummm...

 
A:  "Jackie Chan!"    WHAT THE?!?!?!

 
A again:  "Justin Bieber!"       ..........
 
J:  "Yeah, he looks like a girl."    <eye roll>

 
J again:  "The girl from 'The Hunger Games', she's hot."      Eww.  I do not wish to think about who my boy finds "hot". 

 
T:  "Jennie Garth, because you look alike."    T is my new favorite.

 
A:  "Julianne Hough from 'Safe Haven'."     I'll take it.

 
My ex-husband had sent me a text asking something about one of the kids, so I threw the question out there to him too.  (Yeah, I do not know what is wrong with me.)
 
His response:  "The chick from 'The Notebook', or Gwyneth Paltrow."     Huh.  He must have been in a rare good mood. 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Surprisingly (?) none of these answers helped.  The first people I had thought of were Kate Gosselin and Octomom.  Only because they have a lot of kids.  But, yuck.
 

 
Then I thought of Florence Henderson as Carol Brady; large family, blended family, both accurate.  But I don't know if 1970's housewife Carol could deal with some of the craziness that is mi vida.  Mi vida loca.
 

 
And then it hit me:  Jennifer Garner.  There seems to be some similarities in our real lives, and she has had such a broad range of tv and movie roles that she's not really stuck in one category.                               

 
Jen, as I affectionately call her, (not really, but it's shorter to type) seems to be a down home family girl who loves being a mom and wife, which I totally relate to.  She's kind of girl-next-doorish; not flamboyant or over the top, just a nice girl who is pretty down to earth.  Real.  Just being herself.  Kind of a sweetheart, but if you messed with her kids, I bet her mama bear instincts would come out and she would do some damage!  She also has a spark and a drive to step outside the box and do more; not because her family isn't enough, but because she wants to, and she knows how to find the balance.  This isn't an aspect of my life I'm exploring too deeply at the moment, but I definitely have learned that while it is amazing to be a mother and I love it more than life, there are other things out in the world that don't revolve around my kids, and those things can be exciting.  A couple of facts I found about Jen that are relatable:
 
-Jennifer Garner wasn't a fan of baseball before meeting her Boston Red Sox-loving husband Ben Affleck. "The more I watched – 'cause it was on all the time – the more he explained, the more I like it. Now I really like it," she told Allure in 2007.    -I was never a sports fan, until I had children that were natural born athletes, and I began spending the majority of my time at, preparing for, and/or talking about sports.
 
-Jennifer Garner almost got arrested the day of her prom. She and a friend were sunbathing topless in a park when police spotted them. "Can you imagine calling your parents [and saying], 'I was laying out naked,'" she told Teen People.    -Yeah, I have a few stories from when I was a teenager that my mom still doesn't want to hear about. 
 
-In 2010 she said:  "I understand that being an actress as well as being at home isn't some heroic thing," she says of being a working mom. "That doesn't mean it isn't confusing or difficult – especially that question of how you find a balance."    -When I was a single mom working full time, people often exclaimed over how much I did.  But I never felt like it was something to be looked up to, just something that had to be done.  But that didn't mean it wasn't hard, damn hard, and exhausting. 
                                                      
                              So while Jennifer Garner and I are by no means clones, I think there's definitely some similarities,
and I bet she could take my life story and nail it. 
 
 
Now, about those royalty checks?