Friday, March 15, 2013

Secret Subject Swap, March - Take Two!

It's that time again, Secret Subject Swap time! 


I love doing these, if you haven't tried it you need to! Karen from Baking In a Tornado is in charge and she will help you get started. Go ahead, contact her, you know you want to.
This week 13 bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were each assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Put your feet up and check out everyone's posts! :
My subject is "...and then you woke up and realized it was all a dream..." submitted by Suburbia Interrupted , who is one amazing chick if you ask me. If you haven't read her stuff, start with the secret subject post and keep reading!
I have a friend who loves to try and figure out what dreams mean. She has a dream interpretation book and uses it all the time.  So I thought to myself: Self, let's try and analyze these oddball nocturnal musings.  Ok, I don't really talk like that, it was more like: What the hell did that stupid dream mean?!  So I found a great site called Dream Moods and decided to look up a few dreams that I've had. 
~Flavor Flav
Yes, I had a dream with Flavor Flav in it.  No, I was not doing acid.  This was years ago but I still remember it because it was so random and weird. Not only was the Public Enemy member in my dream, but we were flirting and I think maybe (gag) kissing.  WTH?  Have you ever seen Flavor Flav?  Here:

You're welcome.

So when I went to Dream Moods, I had to pick a category. ' Freakish Rap Stars of the 90's' was not a category, so I went with 'Celebrities': 
To dream that you are kissing or having sex with a celebrity indicates your drive to be successful. Consider what qualities or movies you associate this celebrity with or what makes this celebrity famous for clues as to where and what you want to achieve success in. Alternatively, the dream may just represent your fascination or obsession with this particular celebrity. 

Ok, I don't even know how to begin picking that the F apart!  I do not know what I  would want to achieve based on Flavor Flav; gold teeth?  A big ass clock necklace?  Yelling "Yeah Boyee!" all the damn time?  Mostly I just want to achieve showering, fitting into my pre-baby jeans, and getting the kids to go 5 minutes IN A ROW without fighting . Maybe I should just go with the gold teeth; easier to accomplish. 
The alternative, a "fascination or obsession" with this celebrity is also oh-so-wrong.  Tupac? Yes. LL Cool J?  Mama likey.  Flavor Flav?  Hells to the No.
I have this reoccuring dream, ever since middle school, that I'm so pissed at someone that I'm gonna kick their butt.  But when I try to punch them, it's like this force holds back my fist, and as hard as I try to swing, my arm moves in slow-motion and never makes contact.  It frutrates the crap out of me in my dream.  So I figured I would look that one up. Gotta figure out why in my dreams I feel like Muhammad Ali, but fight like Angelina Ballerina.

Dream Moods has 'Punching' as a category.  It tells me: 
To dream that you are unable to throw a punch indicates that you are feeling helpless. You may have self-esteem and confidence issues. The dream may also be due to REM paralysis.

Whoa, nelly.  That one kinda hits home.  I do have self-esteem and confidence issues, always have.  I was a very shy kid, and I've gotten over some of that but not all of it.  If I seem confident at all, it's usually a front.  There's definitely some things I'm confident about, but as a person in general, eh, not so much. Being in a marriage where your significant other puts you down constantly can really do a number on your self esteem, too. [ My first marriage, I mean; this second one is soo the opposite :) ]
Now "REM paralysis", what the poop is that?  I've heard of REM, a cycle of sleep, and I was going to google that phrase. Then I remembered who I am, and that if it said anything remotely worry-worthy about my sleeping patterns, I would never sleep again, convinced I would die before I wake.  So yeah, skipping over that part. 
~Teeth falling out
Another weirdo dream I have a lot is my teeth falling out.  Like it'll just be a regular day, and all of a sudden Plunk, one of my teeth unattaches from my gums and lands in the bottom of my mouth.  Ew.  Gross.  And stupid, right? Who dreams about their teeth?

Apparently, it's one of the most common dreams that Dream Moods gets asked about. 
One theory is that dreams about your teeth reflect your anxieties about your appearance and how others perceive you. Your teeth help to convey an image of attractiveness and play an important role in the game of flirtation, whether it is flashing those pearly white, kissing or necking. Thus, such dreams may stem from a fear of rejection, sexual impotence or the consequences of getting old. To support this notion, a dream research found that women in menopause report to have frequent dreams about teeth. This points to teeth dreams as being related to getting older and/or feeling unattractive and less feminine. Teeth are an important feature to your attractiveness and how you are presented to others. Caring about how you look is natural and healthy.

Another rationalization for these falling teeth dreams may be rooted in your fear of being embarrassed or making a fool of yourself in some situation. These dreams are an over-exaggeration of your worries and anxieties. Perhaps you feel that you are unprepared for the task at hand. However, you will find that your worries are unfounded in most cases. Sometimes what plays out in your mind is far worse than what is
Once I stopped laughing over the use of the word 'necking', I realized that this too is pretty right on.  I do worry about my appearance, especially my weight, and am having a heck of a time accepting the fact that I'm getting older.  oldER, not old, got it?  Right. So. Moving on...
I also do get really tight-assed about embarassing myself and looking stupid.  I've sat out of many activities because I was afraid I would look like a doofus and embarass myself.  I really envy people that just jump in and try new things, and hey if it works it works, if not, it was fun to try!  I'm trying to work on that, and realize that the world won't end if I don't do everything perfectly, and that laughing and saying Wow, I really suck at this! is better than sitting in the corner being afraid and self conscious.
With the Flavor Flav kissing and the Muhammad/Angelina brawling and the fang-falling,  I'm always glad to wake up and realize it was all a dream.


  1. OMG!!! I have the tooth dream ALL THE TIME. And after I read the reasons why, well, read my post and see how accurate it is.... :)

  2. Great post! Ive had all those dreams, except Flava Flav. Thank God! I actually use dream moods as a reference when things stick with me. Funny post!

    1. It's kind of fun to look up and see what they have to say! Can't believe I admitted to the Flavor Flav dream lol

  3. wow! That's pretty fascinating, as long as you don't get dragged into actually believing all that! :D
    I also did a double take on seeing the word 'necking'! I didn't know it was still around (so, dating myself!!)

  4. You may be self conscious but it sure as hell shouldn't be about your writing. I laughed through this whole piece (other than the cringing and shuddering at the thought of kissing Flavor Flav). You OWNED this prompt!

  5. I had a hard time moving past the Flavor Flav part because I was laughing so hard I actually read it twice. Then when I did move on I continued laughing. I needed that laugh. So thank you! So happy to have come across this from the Secret Swap. You're great, I'll be back. :)

    1. Wow, thank you so much! I'm honestly continually amazed when people like my stuff! I'm really glad you came by, please come back! :)

  6. I'm thinking that book needs to redefine "celebrity" when referring to Flavor Flav! (I can only say or type his name by yelling it loudly in his voice!)

    I guess the good news of being with him is that you would always know what time it was...and you could probably get free cable based upon the amount of metal in his teeth. (You know that has to be covered tin foil.)

    I also have the teeth falling out dream. I tell myself it's the universe's way of telling me to stop eating candy. So I wake up and immediately start eating candy.

    1. HAHA!! I laughed so hard reading this! Way to find a silver lining in dating someone creepy!

  7. The tooth dream plagues me--I used to work in a dental office--it was terrible. To this day, I keep having the same dream that I have to go back to work there, and once I do, all my teeth fall out into my hands! I have to wake myself up out of that nightmare!!

    1. Oh goodness, that sounds awful! Bad teeth and a bad job! Booooo :(